I need to tell the story of Mr Vanilla. I didn’t dominate him or even date him but I did have the world’s biggest crush on him until I realised how vanilla he was. It’s strange how someone can go from being the sexiest man in the world (slight over kill) to completely unattractive. I know that this feeling is because of how I’m wired but I didn’t expect to go completely cold on him. I used to have fantasies about dressing him up in latex and pulling him round on a lead, parading him, then running away to have a beautiful white wedding. Oh how reality really did bite me in the ass.
I worked with Mr Vanilla he was talk dark and handsome. He had the perfect ass, I never got the chance to see it out the small, small shorts but wow it was so tight I wanted to grab it and then spank it. I’m getting slightly flustered writing about it. We went through a short phase of working alongside each other every day so we got to know each other pretty well. I didn’t tell him everything but I did tell him a few stories so that he knew I was a little alternative.
One afternoon we were all having a break and a laugh about this that and the other until one of the guys decided to share that he enjoyed having a (just one apparently) finger put in his ass by his wife. Everyone began nervous laughing until another guy admitted he also enjoyed it, this continued until pretty much all the guys had admitted it apart from Mr Vanilla who sat there quietly. They all turned to me being the only woman in the conversation and asked me whether I liked to do it. Now we all know I like to do more than just put a finger in there but obviously my work colleagues are unaware of my extra curricula activities, so I smiled and gave a polite nod. I remember the exact words out of Mr Vanilla’s month “Why would you want to put something up there?” One of the guys replied because it feels fucking great. I was so gutted by this point so I casually asked “Would you not consider trying it?” He looked at me shocked like I just asked him to bend over and let me shove one in, he replied with the no offence typical male answer “That hole is an out hole, not an in hole” I laughed and said “I bet that wouldn’t stop you putting your dick in a girls ass”. The conversation progressed to the guys admitting to also letting their partners put little vibrators up there. I walked over to Mr Vanilla who was looking all sorts of confused and I asked what was up? He just looked up at me with his gorgeous dark eyes (damn you) and said “I’ve never even been into Ann Summers, I wouldn’t even know what you get in there” I laughed which was a little cruel and said “You get sexual paraphernalia in there” I think I started giving him a brief rundown of some items to which he gave me a bemused expression. Luckily the break ended and I wondered of thinking to myself I don’t think I can play with this one.
A few weeks later I told him that I was into a bit of kink to see whether that would lure him in, unfortunately apart from making him extremely curious he was still incredibly vanilla. Not too long after I left that work position and stopped seeing him. I really hope that he meets a woman who will show him that a cheeky finger in the ass won’t make him less of a man. Fingers crossed afterwards he thinks of me and gives me a call. I’ll show him what it means to be my man.
Keep embracing that cheeky finger…